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The Simpsons Character You Are Based On Your Zodiac Sign

The Simpsons Character You Are Based On Your Zodiac Sign

“The Simpsons” is the longest-running show in American primetime television history and also one of the most influential, shaping small-screen comedy and helping to dictate what’s perceived as funny since its debut as a series of animated vignettes on “The Tracey Ullman Show” in 1987. It’s a layered show, offering slapstick, pathos, observational comedy, and cutting satire of almost every aspect of regular life. Despite being a show about yellow-skinned, four-fingered people who never age but adapt with the times, living in Springfield, a city with no known state affiliation, “The Simpsons” is one of the most astute cultural portrayals of human behavior ever disseminated to a wide audience.

Springfield is home to hundreds of “Simpsons” characters, many of whom embody traits that line up with astrological or star signs — the horoscope component that many people believe affects one’s personality and behavior. Determined by birthdate and where the stars in the sky are in relation to Earth during that time, a horoscope can theoretically say a lot about a person. Here are all the major “Simpsons” characters who fit into the 12 specific astrological signs — and who you may be most like if you’ve got the same one.

Aries: Homer Simpson

The Aries star sign, represented by the Ram, aligns with people whose birthdays fall from March 21 to April 19. According to Co-Star Astrology, Aries live life on their own terms; they tend to act impulsively, and are prone to fits of temper. They’ve got a palpable, unapologetic lack of self-control and no filter, quickly growing bored with whatever upset them and moving on to the next thing to strike their fancy or earn their attention.

Impulsive, thoughtless, and quick to bouts of extreme emotion? That’s a description that well fits “Simpsons” patriarch Homer Simpson. He’s a man who lives for junk food, beer, lusty encounters with his wife, and boldly shirking his duties at work. In terms of somebody who quickly grows bored with things, Homer will yell out “BORING!” if something fails to capture his interest, a trait also embodied by his penchant to suddenly take on new jobs (e.g., astronaut, truck driver, grease salesman, grifter, amateur ambulance driver) or announce a heretofore unmentioned “lifelong dream.”

Taurus: Marge Simpson

A Taurus, or the Bull, is the star sign for people with birthdays from April 20 to May 20. According to Co-Star Astrology, a Taurus lives their life in black and white terms — there’s no middle ground. They also avoid major changes and like to settle down into the life they’ve created for themselves, preferring to stay home and snuggle rather than going out and partying. They like order and sameness, and may even wear the same clothes everyday. A Taurus (per Horoscope) works hard and is persistent in achieving their goals, and will do whatever it takes to get done what they need to for themselves or their family.

Marge Simpson is a Taurus in that she’s a hallmark of the calm, the standard, and predictable. This is a character who discourages her family from causing a ruckus, grumbling to herself or expressing that something “isn’t a good idea” or that the Simpsons ought to just “forget their troubles with a big bowl of strawberry ice cream.” Marge is proudly square, and she genuinely enjoys cooking, cleaning, hanging out at her house, and snuggling with her beloved Homer. In a testament to how she much likes order, she even has a closet full of identical green dresses.

Gemini: Bart Simpson

If your birthday is anywhere from May 21 to June 20, then you’re a Gemini, symbolized by The Twins. The Gemini, per Co-Star Astrology, is extremely charming, funny, and talkative, which combines to create a confidence that lets them get away with a lot. They’re sharp and energetic, according to Horoscope, and they don’t enjoy too many moments of mental quietude. Nor do they easily bore or tire — they always find ways to keep themselves busy. Additionally, Geminis are loyal but will call out loved ones if they feel they’ve been mistreated.

Bart Simpson fits this profile of a Gemini — he’s a troublemaker with endless energy and an indefatigable independent streak, always staging a prank, crime, adventure, or other activity to amuse himself and make the best of the time he’s not stuck in a classroom. He’s clever, crafty, and persuasive, too, allowing him to evade any lasting consequences when he’s caught by his principal, teachers, or parents. Bart is also quite loyal, frequently teaming up with people he openly mocks but secretly loves and respects, including father Homer (whom he calls by his first name), annoying sister Lisa, geeky best friend Milhouse, and bully Nelson.

Cancer: Lisa Simpson

Cancer, or the Crab, is the star sign assigned to those with birthdays between June 21 and July 22. According to Co-Star Astrology, Cancers are complicated, with personalities that contain multitudes and aspects that sometimes contradict one another. They’re extremely sensitive and often in search of comfort for the wounds they incur in everyday life, which are more voluminous than they are for others because Cancers tend to be empathetic and forgiving — although they never quite forget the cause of their torment and they remain world-weary deep down.

Lisa Simpson represents the Cancer on “The Simpsons.” Nobody in Springfield thinks harder, feels harder, and agonizes over the social ills and their own perceived flaws more than the jazz-loving child who might be too smart for her own good. The very definition of a Cancer, Lisa is overly sensitive and needs to be handled gently, so as not to toy with her emotions. And many “Simpsons” episodes have featured Homer thoughtfully or callously offending Lisa and trying to get back in her good graces, which she eventually tentatively allows, because it’s the right thing to do for her heart, not because of others’ feelings.

Leo: Krusty the Clown

For those with a birthday from July 23 to August 22, their star sign is Leo, represented by the Lion. Leos, according to Co-Star Astrology, tend to be not just artistic types, but individuals who get into the creative or performing arts because they’ve got a huge, overwhelming personality, and getting up in front of people is a surefire way to get them the attention and approval they crave. Subsequently, Leos may also be a little bit conceited but, as artists, reflect and interpret the human experience. They’re also warm and feel their feelings hard.

A big character who strives to be the center of attention because they’ve got an unquenchable thirst for acceptance and praise — that’s Springfield’s resident celebrity, kiddie TV show host, and product licenser Krusty the Clown. Becoming an entertainer against his rabbi father’s wishes, young Herschel Krustofsy became a television clown and comedian who jokes around for children on TV every day while, off-screen, he buries his self-loathing and wounded heart with all kinds of vices.

Virgo: Waylon Smithers

Virgo, otherwise known as the Virgin, is the name of the star sign for individuals with a birthday between August 23 and September 22. Above all, the Virgo, according to Co-Star Astrology, has a deep-seated need to be useful. They’re quick to offer a solution and they know a lot about a lot of things, including human nature. That understanding comes out in the form of quick-witted character assessments and judgments of others. Virgos are full of ideas, supportive, and analytical in their detail-oriented quest for perfection.

A consummate Virgo, Springfield Nuclear Power plant executive assistant and all-around bootlick Waylon Smithers found himself the perfect life path. He lives his life largely not for himself, but in sacrificial, self-ignoring service to his boss and crush, the tyrannical C. Montgomery Burns. Putting his skills of judgment to the test, Smithers is always at the ready with an accurate if nasty assessment of Burns’ underlings (upon request), while he’s also the person who makes sure that power plant remains operational. By quietly and aggressively making sure every one of Mr. Burns personal and professional needs are met, Smithers stays philosophically satisfied, and Springfield’s lights stay on.

Libra: Milhouse Van Houten

For those who were born somewhere from September 23 to October 22, their star sign is Libra, represented by The Scales. A Libra, according to Co-Star Astrology, is a little bit shy and awkward in everyday situations to the point where they avoid conflict and want everybody’s side to get a fair shake. As such, they also hate to be left alone, have a hard time making decisions, and frequently retreat into a fantasy world of their own making when they’re not wishing that other people see them as brave and noble.

“The Simpsons” gave the world a real Libra with Milhouse Van Houten. Uncomfortable in his own skin and desperately trying to fit in with others, the young nerd is desperate for the approval of his peers, particularly his best friend (and dominator) Bart Simpson and his dream partner, Lisa Simpson. This is a kid who once sheepishly proclaimed that his “mom thinks [he’s cool]” and fantasizes about a future in which he’s romantically paired up with Lisa, despite her being totally out of his league. In the meantime, milquetoast Milhouse quietly hopes that the world sees him as special as he believes he is.

Scorpio: C. Montgomery Burns

Scorpio, or The Scorpion, is the assigned star sign for those who were born between October 23 and November 21. According to Horoscope, Scorpios are passion-driven and will forge their own path in the world with little care for the ramifications or what other people might think. They don’t back away from controversy and seem harsh and frightening to others. However, they can be very emotional, privately, so their scorpion-like outer shell protects them and their agenda from harm.

An extremely driven person who wants what they want and will do anything to get it, never mind the consequences? That describes Springfield’s local elderly plutocrat and downright evil power plant owner C. Montgomery Burns. Trained from his youth to be a wealthy elite who rules over those below him (whom he perceives as everyone) with an iron fist, Mr. Burns and his pathological needs for wealth and power cannot be discouraged by things like widespread resentment or fines for the violation of environmental law. But beneath his icy exterior, Mr. Burns does have a heart — he’s often fallen in love with women who didn’t reciprocate his feelings, and he stopped at nothing to retrieve the one relic from his childhood, his teddy bear, Bobo, from the clutches of Maggie Simpson.

Sagittarius: Ned Flanders

For anyone with a birthdate that falls from November 22 to December 21, their star sign is Sagittarius, or The Archer. According to Co-Star Astrology, a Sagittarius seeks the truth about life, the universe, and everything, which they do through research, in all its forms, and by consulting those they perceive as experts. They want knowledge, and have a keen interest in religion and philosophy and are really on a quest for the meaning of life while maintaining a low-key, quiet life. They’re also bold, assertive, easygoing, enthusiastic, and relentlessly optimistic.

The biggest Sagittarius in Springfield: creepily wholesome neighborino Ned Flanders. He’s as pious and religiously devout as they come, living his life strictly by a code of conduct interpreted from his near-constant Bible study (he “does everything the Bible says, even the stuff that contradicts the other stuff”) as well as prayer, contemplation, and pestering his unwitting spiritual advisor, Reverend Lovejoy. In addition to constantly trying to be the best Christian he can be, he’s cheerful to a fault, letting most people walk all over him with a smile.

Capricorn: Principal Skinner

Should one’s birthday have occurred from December 22 to January 19, then their star sign is Capricorn, the Sea Goat. According to Co-Star Astrology, Capricorns are the kind of people one might call an “old soul,” because they’ve behaved like upstanding adults since they were children. They love discipline, structure, and well-stated goals, and they’re perfectionists constantly engaged in an interior monologue. They quietly wish for respect but won’t do much to draw attention to themselves.

It’s hard to imagine somebody who imagines these stated characteristics of a Capricorn more than Principal Seymour Skinner, put-upon administrator of Springfield Elementary School on “The Simpsons.” He’s as uptight as they come, unable to relax even when he’s not on the clock as a rule-enforcing principal of a school where nobody much pays him any mind, be it the students, teachers, or Superintendent Chalmers. Skinner wants what’s best for the school but cowers in the face of disrespect, usually muttering sad-sack musings to himself (or over the school’s P.A. system).

Aquarius: Maggie Simpson

According to the star sign charts, Aquarius (The Water Bearer) is the designation for those with a birthday from January 20 to February 18. The Aquarius, according to Horoscope, is smart and calculating, which can sometimes come across as distant. They’re passionate and treasure individual freedom, but they know themselves well enough to tread carefully into new situations because they seriously consider the long-term implications before acting. They’re also sincere and unfailingly loyal to their select social and familial circle.

While she’s only a few months old and not yet speaking, Maggie Simpson has a rich character and booming interior life. Because she doesn’t talk, Maggie can come across to her parents or siblings as aloof or non-participatory, but viewers realize she’s merely a sponge of an observer, soaking in all of her family’s actions and behaviors to help her forge her growing personality, informing as much as what she doesn’t want to be as what she does. Maggie is also an Aquarius in that she’s extremely loyal — she dutifully follows Lisa around, loves the company of Santa’s Little Helper, and holds up her mother as a deity-like figure, so much so that she shows her independent side and goes looking for Marge when she takes a brief vacation to Rancho Relaxo. Maggie does a lot on her own, actually, from organizing a daycare center revolt to hanging out with a gang of woodland creatures.

Pisces: Barney Gumble

For people with a birthday between February 19 and March 20, their star sign is Pisces, also known as The Fishes. According to Co-Star Astrology, the overarching personality of a Pisces is tough to pinpoint because they tend to adopt the traits of whoever they’re hanging around with. They let life happen to them and go with the flow, more likely to just go ahead and do things instead of losing themselves in thought first. This makes for a spontaneous (at best) and flaky (at worst) character, the kind of people both seasoned by life experience but still immature and who romantically attribute meaning to outside stimuli, as if everything is the universe sending them a message.

A Pisces can be a bit rudderless or without conviction, and no “Simpsons” character floats through life without purpose more than Barney Gumble, Homer’s high school best friend and adulthood drinking buddy. Barney virtually lives at Moe’s Tavern, where, despite a few periods of sobriety that didn’t quite take, he spends most of his time drinking beer, being drunk, and belching. He’ll occasionally hop on board for some activity if it’s someone else’s suggestion, like carousing around town, joining the space program, or becoming a member of the Be-Sharps.

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